Sometimes it takes a simple object lesson and a dose of karma for the narcissist before they finally ‘get’ what is blatantly apparent to the rest of us.
Three Words No One Wants to Hear : “ Meet Your Replacement”
Dear Narcissist, imagine walking into work Monday morning —briefcase and coffee in hand to find someone else sitting at your desk. You demand to know who they are and why they are in your office and your chair—no less! You get nothing but a condescending look and an icy stare. Quickly, you run to your boss’s office, intending to report the intruder. To your dismay, your boss shrugs and says:
“Yeah, well, things have changed. The person at your desk emailed me his resume late Friday afternoon, and I couldn’t help but check him out. Frankly, I was swept away by what he offered compared to you. Then, once I decided to go with him, I felt it best to get on with things, so I moved your items out over the weekend and contacted HR. We’ve already assigned him your office, title, salary, and bonus package.
(Patting you on the back.) But I know you; you’re a survivor. I’m confident you’ll land on your feet, even without any salary continuation. I also allocated your unused vacation time to them; it helped me sweeten the deal.
Try not to take this personally. I assure you, you did nothing wrong. You always did what you said you would, and everyone around here knows you’re the nicest person in the world.
But frankly, the new person is –well –new and exciting.
Please take consolation in knowing that I was delighted with you until New Person and their razzle-dazzle newness caught my attention. The bottom line here is that they are more than what I think I deserve at this point.
No hard feelings, old buddy, old pal?”
That’s What Sudden Narcissist Discard is Like
You’re experiencing life as usual, and everything changes the next thing you know .
The self-absorbed can do this in the blink of an eye in their relationships and private lives. However, when the shoe is on the other foot (as in a professional venue like the one described above), these same selfish folks scream like a scalded dog when it happens to them.
Never fear because Dante is standing at the inferno, stoking the fire. In my opinion, not giving someone the basic courtesy of a heads up when life-changing events are afoot is unconscionable —unless one’s physical/mental safety is at imminent risk.
This may require ghosting a physically abusive partner.
Many of us had our marriages and long-term relationships end like this.
Cut us a break. We’re not so short-sighted as to believe that being in a relationship is a guarantee that things will never change.
We fully acknowledge that people fall out of love and want to divorce. It happens all the time.
But there is a right and wrong way to make such changes. Blindsiding partners in this manner is never acceptable.
Karma for the Narcissist: The Magic Merry-Go-Round
We’ve all heard it said that what goes around comes around. We, the aggrieved party, may not personally get to see it, but it always happens – -eventually.
There are no sacred cows in the universe. Like us mere mortals, these hit-and-run con artists also have a date with destiny on their books. They cannot (and will not) escape cosmic accountability any more than we will —or have.
Unfortunately, their deluded selfishness often makes us face unpleasant dates with destinies —often suddenly and shockingly. But the bright note here is that when that happens, we get our dates off the books sooner rather than later.
Well, they get to live, never knowing when the other shoe will drop for them. They get to skip off to live their shiny new life, never knowing what day they will pull their ticket to ride the Magic Bus.